Wowwww Shout out to our ingenious writer and fashion diva Qunicy Iwediokpulu.
We love you so much and thanks for always sharing. Happy Birthday dear
Okay lets enjoy this new note by Q..*The Good, Bad boy Theory*
“I sincerely lay no claims to being more knowledgeable than anyone, for these are merely my perceptions about life and they are opened to debate and criticisms -please feel free to anytime. However I do believe I know better than I knew yesterday and many years before. The sincere purpose is to be able to bless someone out there for knowledge is tyrannical unless it is shared. Enjoy!
It was an argument neither of us was going to win..lai lai! He was wrong, I was wrong, he was right and I was right and whether we wanted to admit it or not…Good girls will always be attracted to bad guys and vice versa. It is basically the theory of attraction, simple! Yet Ola no let me hear word!
“So you wan tell me say those girls no know wetin them dey do?…abeggie! They know!” he retorted angrily
“Chai! Ola why are you taking this thing personal na…no be fight o” I pleaded surprised at his outburst.
“Q, reason this thing out with me na. See I have seen a girl who says she enjoyed her man slapping and beating her whenever she does something wrong…to her if he hadn’t, she would think him weak and you are here telling me that, what…good girls don’t like bad boys? They do! They enjoy everything bad about them.” He insisted.
“So you are saying she enjoyed the pain that every muscle on her chin created as soon as the slap landed? See, this is what I think about the matter o...Any human that says he or she enjoys pain must have a very disoriented personality o…or a terrible upbringing and that applies to women who admit such insolence” I explained, taking a deep breath to calm my nerve because the mere mention of violence against women sef dey turn my belle inside out.
“But then we are not talking about violence Ola, we are talking about attraction” I continued ignoring the crested “I still no believe you” look on his face.
“And in that light, what’s even your definition of “bad” sef” I continued looking blankly at him.
“Ehemm….bold, adventurous and daring” he answered grinning from teeth to teeth.
I laughed acknowledging that indeed even the evil word had found a more pleasing definition. Oh how the world has changed o!
“In short there is bad guy, badt guy and baddest guy” he said laughing unctuously “It all depends on the level of badness” he continued and I could not stop laughing.
“Abeg explain…” I pleaded chuckling
“bad guy is the one I just defined na…the bold, adventurous one wey get some good boy swag. Na him be the type wey go still take you out on date, wear suit and black shade tins, whereas he still get babe wey he wan take out in the next hour. The dude go still write you poem even sing for you but he save your number as Babe three. Then badt guy na the one wey don move small pass the bold and adventurous stage. He own level get swag pass bad boy. This one go tell you pump and plain…that he be player…so if you are down with it…good for you…not down, waka pass. He would fulfill all of your fantasy, you name it, as long as you are down for it. Then baddest guy…na this one carry the correct dictionary definition of bad for himself. Love am no love am, na u sabi. Ehen.. like the one wey fit punch the life out of you”.
“Ehen?…and a good dude can’t be the first one-bad guy- the bold, adventurous and daring one after all you said the bad guy has some good boy swag?” I asked bemused beyond words.
“Nope. See a good boy would want to always be good and that means being morally constrain to the world’s perception of what being good is. He only see two edges in life-good and bad and has chosen good. So he can’t do things outside the boundary he has created for himself, hence he cannot be bold or adventurous and women dig adventurous well well. They love to try out different things that they believe to be exciting. They want their blood to boil, their hearts to beat faster!”
“And being good isn’t exciting?” I asked confused now.
“Yup!” he laughed. “Not anymore…not in this rubbish generation we exist in and the truth is that women of today are easily bored. Imagine that my cougar na, the one that calls me whenever her husband is away on a trip. You want to tell me that her husband isn’t giving her all the right loving in the right way and right proportion? Forget jor! una like crazy action even though it is yeye words and lies that brought you people into our arms in the first place. Tell me, these days, which girl you can take to go and watch the stars, do all the romantic rudimentary with, will come back and tell her friends that you are a romantic man? They go just sit down yab nonsense comot for your body. Romance ko, romance ni” He said laughing as he strolled back to his seat and sat.
“See Q, make I tell you the truth. Back then in school eh I be good boy…comfirm good boy to the core. I know dey smoke, drink, parry sef, my bible dey follow me sleep for under my pillow. In short Jesus know my middle name and when it came to babes….showwww! na me get all the good boy moves…forming romantic and speaking geek English until for my eye, koro koro, one badt guy, just come for nowhere uproot me comot for road…come carry my babe go”
“Ehen?” I asked trying to suppress a giggle.
“E started like joke na. The guy will be calling her phone all the time, taking her to places and shit., Chai! I dull that time sha…and you go see me dey try reason things with her na…dey absorb all the rubbish lies wey she dey dish me…thinking say haba na…na love sure pass… The one that pains me most is that, these girls know that they are badt guys o..mschewww!” he sighed ruthlessly as he shook his head side to side.
“Being a good boy now is like telling a woman that you have hairs on the chest yet no balls below” he said sarcastically.
“Hmm, to me o!” I answered “I think all those bad boy phases are when a woman isn’t ready to settle down…because usually it takes a bad boy turn good boy to settle down. Real bad boys no wan hear anything marriage…they wan flex life till they die.”
“Hmmm not all the time o…I’ve seen real bad boys…who have gotten married” he insisted.
“They must have eventually got tired na…of being bad…However if they hadn’t and you really checked things out, you will see that either the girls got pregnant for them and had no choice but to accept the pregnancies or menh! Water don pass garri…their families had taken matters into their hands and sought for an intervention” I laughed. “One way or the other….the regular badt guy dey fear marriage. They see it as an end to a beautiful era. These good women are simply misguided to think they can change them and funny enough, some do, some don’t”
“But it is quite different the other way round now though. Very few good men marry good women…all of them are going for the badt ones…no one wan carry last” he laughed spinning his phone on the table surface.
“Hmmm” I muttered trying to comprehend this tiny bit of information. It’s almost true that eh these days, men see being good as being inexperienced on so many levels and in so many places, particularly the bedroom. They don’t want inexperience women in their beds. Very few go for the untouched (eh that is if we still have virgins, they would say in their defense and I would always ask…who then is disvirgining the virgins? Aren’t we all regardless of gender, supposed to be virgins?). I remembered my best friend back in school always pointing out the fact that he would never want to be with a virgin but personally, I thought and still think that, that talk is crap (reasons I would proffer another time).
I however believe that any woman that chooses to be with a bad, badt guy or baddest guy hasn’t truly decided for herself what it is she wants and is simply carried away by the excitement and adventures that these men proffer. When eventually she does decide, she would seek stability and change which these men may or may not provide.
My people o that’s my thought…but what’s yours? Do you think being good is boring and we women cannot really help but love the bad guys? Do you think being bad, badt or baddest is the right way to become a true man? Please what’s your thought…
Written by Quincy Iwediokpulu
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